Has your relationship started to feel more like managing a shared calendar than sharing a life? Maybe you love each other deeply, but the spark feels… missing. According to a 2024 study by the American Psychological Association, 42% of married couples say they feel emotionally disconnected or bored at some point in their marriage. And most of them aren’t fighting , they’re just stuck in repeat mode.
But boredom doesn’t mean your relationship is broken. It just means your connection needs a refresh , not a full reset.
In this article, we’ll explore 11 fun and honest ways to make marriage feel exciting again , the kind that doesn’t need a fancy vacation or big changes. Just small shifts that bring you back to each other.
Ever feel like you’re living the same day over and over with your partner? That’s a major reason many couples search online for how to bring excitement back into a marriage.
Doing something new together , even small things like trying a weird ice cream flavour or taking a new route on your evening walk , can rewire your brains to feel closer again. Psychologists call this the “novelty effect,” and studies show it increases dopamine, the same chemical linked to early-stage romance.
Stat to back it: A 2023 study by the University of Toronto found that couples who did one new activity per week reported a 23% increase in relationship satisfaction over 3 months.
When was the last time you and your partner just laughed together? Not polite smiles , we’re talking goofy, stomach-clutching laughter. If you’re wondering how to make your marriage exciting again, humour might be the answer you’ve overlooked.
Being silly lowers tension and builds emotional safety. Play a dumb board game, send ridiculous memes, or have a kitchen dance-off , anything that lightens the mood.
Stat to back it: According to a 2022 Psychology Today report, couples who laugh together often are 67% more likely to describe their relationship as “very happy.”
If your marriage feels repetitive, probably so is your routine. One of the best ways to make your relationship feel exciting was to break that routine.
Home could be trying a new hobby together, making some random international dish, or going out for an unplanned local adventure. Novelty is powerful, reminding your brain and heart that your partner is someone worth discovering a little more.
Stat to back it: Research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology has found that couples who engage in novel experiences together over a matter of 10 weeks reported a greater degree of satisfaction with their relationships compared to those who continued with the familiar.
We often think intimacy only happens during candlelit dinners or weekend getaways. But real connection is built in the small, everyday moments. To be sure, if there are fun ways to keep a marriage exciting, never allow your perfect date night to be one of them. Laugh while doing the dishes. Send a silly meme. Sit close together while watching a movie at home.
Here’s the truth: According to the Gottman Institute, it’s the little daily interactions that build long-term connection and not just the big, planned moments.
Do something playful or unexpected today. Put a note in the lunch. Dance in the kitchen. Those moments become the glue.
Feeling stuck in a routine? That’s one of the biggest things that couples say cause boredom in a marriage. Not always about big issues; most of the time it’s simply about monotony.
Whether that is dancing a routine picked up from YouTube, cooking an unknown cuisine for the first time, or heading out for a spontaneous road trip and spending a couple of nights on the road-the thrills brought by trying new things can rekindle an ordinary bond.
Research reports that couples that engage in new activities seem to be more satisfied with their relationship (Aron et al., Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2000). That’s because novelty activates the reward system of the brain the same way as when you were first falling in love.
Start small. Paint together. Do a funny TikTok challenge. Take turns planning surprise evenings. You’ll feel like a team again.
When was the last time you truly surprised your partner, not just with a gift but with some time?
It may just be leaving a note in the bag, buying a snack for them without being asked, or even planning some time for them alone.
The Gottman Institute 2023 relationship study found that couples who intentionally surprise each other experience 21% greater emotional connection than those who don’t.
Little surprise interrupts the monotonous routine, giving the feeling of being “seen” … And in many marriages that have lasted a long time- well, isn’t that exactly what we lack?
If your relationship feels stuck, start small: one little surprise a week. It’s not about the object, it’s about the thought.
Remember when you’d hold hands for no reason? Or just cuddle on the couch without it meaning something more?
When couples ask how to bring back excitement in marriage, this is often where it starts. Not grand gestures, just gentle, consistent physical closeness. A slow dance in the kitchen.
Research from the Kinsey Institute (2022) found that 85% of couples who reported high marital satisfaction maintained regular non-sexual physical affection.
It’s not always about sex. It’s about touch. Safe, soft, grounding touch that tells your partner, “I’m still here. We’re still us.”
Something really out of the ordinary. No, it does not have to be costly or too dramatic. Take a dance class together, do a new DIY project, visit some uncharted town area, or maybe cook something that neither of you ever has tasted before. It all serves to bring back some fun into their married life by way of creating new memories.
A study in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships concluded that couples attempting novel activities report a higher relationship satisfaction than those clinging on to their usual routines.
Even silly things, such as making a joint playlist or having a “no-phone dinner”, can induce heaps of laughter and connection.
Remember the days when you and your partner would disclose everything to each other, your weird thoughts, movements, or the names of flying assassins? Eventually, one stops sharing. However, reconnecting emotionally starts with being seen again.
Make time to discuss something besides bills, chores, or kids. Throw out a couple of deep or silly questions to each other, or just chat about some stuff that’s been bothering you lately.
According to Dr. John Gottman’s research, emotional connection is less the #1 indicator of marital satisfaction, but if absent, even sex, vacations, gifts, or anything else would fail to fill the void.
If you’ve been looking for ways to restore emotional intimacy with your partner, know that it starts with curiosity.
When was the last time you both laughed until your stomach hurt? Not over a meme or a movie, but because of something you two did together?
Finding ways to laugh again is a powerful remedy when your marriage feels boring. It brings back lightness, connection, and reminds you that you’re not just partners in life, you’re also friends.
One study published in Personal Relationships has found that couples who laugh together remain together and are satisfied in the long term.
A goofy kitchen dance-off, some stand-up comedy, or reliving some old inside jokes, it just might work your humor muscle.
If all you seem to be doing is go through the actions with your partner, chances are they need to shore up the wilted emotional bond.
Physically standing together does not imply emotional closeness. Emotional distance sets in glacially, slowly growing through the metaphors of silence, pressure, and silent resentment.
In an interesting study conducted by The Gottman Institute, 69 percent of conflicts in marriage are about persistent issues that remain without any lucid resolution; yet, couples who feel connected emotionally go through them more gently and calmly.
So if you want to know how to rebuild emotional connection in a marriage, the first thing to do is setting aside time for those slow, real conversations. Ask questions like:
It’s not about fixing everything. It’s about showing up, with presence, not perfection.
It is not always going to be exciting-the fact is a marriage does not always feel like one. Life happens; it consumes all your time, stress dwells in, and the connection saps as slyly as the sun setting down within your lives-unintended. But the good news? Bringing back the spark does not call for big romantic gestures!
Little, sincere things, like laughter, sharing new experiences, or just toasting to your spouse by listening, can slowly bring back the feeling of what is lost.
According to one study by The National Marriage Project, couples that spend scheduled time together at least once a week are 3.5 times more likely to claim they are “very happy” in their marriage.
So don’t wait for magic to happen. Do one fun thing this week. Just one. You may be surprised by the rapid change.
Life is this monotonous work-chore-parenting thing that barely allows time for anything fun. Usually, couples just stop considering fun, flirting, or a new shared experience, and all the fun just slips by.
Yes. Even happy couples go through phases when things just seem dull. That does not mean love has lessened; it means that your connection needs attention and energy.
A few small things; maybe a small surprise, trying a new activity together, walking with no cell phones. Intimacy in a relationship is woven through the small moments more than through grand declarations.
Cook something they have never tried, have a weird movie night, build a pillow fortress, ask each other silly or deep questions, dance in the living room. Simple fun creates connection.
Indeed. Exactly because routines keep life orderly, the predictability goes on to kill the romance. Breaking that routine, maybe once a week, would generate new energy.
No. It is so very human to long for those early butterflies. One is not to regain those feelings, but rather find new ways of feeling close and excited together.
Talk to each other while truly free from distractions. Express your real feelings, apologies when you need, and thank them for the small things.
The truth is that there is no concrete answer for this. Yet, even once or twice a month can have a sense of adventure and keep them fresh.
Anyway, expressing your feelings is most helpful without blame. You miss that connection, and you want to work on rebuilding it together. If some resistance is felt, maybe couples therapy can become a possible avenue, a safe space to work through things.
It certainly does! Studies show that having fun strikes a chord for emotional closeness and satisfaction. A couple that laughs and tries new things together will, over time, actually feel more bonded toward each other.
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